This spring, I was asked by the Happy Valley Library and the Lake Oswego Parks and Recreation Department to offer several weeks of Mindfulness programs to serve their communities while they coped with the global COVID-19 pandemic. I learned that as people began dealing with the “new normal,” they felt that their lives were turned abnormally “upside down.” This topsy-turvy world caused great stress.
 
How can Mindfulness help us live in this unfamiliar world we find ourselves in? Mindfulness is designed to address real life challenges. I hope that this blog would help you in dealing with the uncertainty and changes we face during these extraordinary times as well as when we can feel the rhythms of normalcy in our daily lives.
 
Mindfulness practice is not just about sitting in meditation; it also embodies the following aspects:

• Goal: The aim of Mindfulness is to align with the goal of attaining well-being and happiness in life.
• Meditation: The purpose of mind exercise to develop our own capacity for mind control and to gain insight.
• Skillful Means: The good news is that we can gain proficiency in utilizing our mental resources to overcome suffering.
• Insight & Wisdom: These tools of self-knowledge guide us to learn the truth about reality and how things actually are.
• Ethics: Moral principles are necessary to create both the internal and the external environments conducive to happiness.
• Scientific Perspective: Science is rooted in predictable, replicable and reliable methods — not based on mere beliefs.

 
So, how can Mindfulness practice can be used in overcoming the stress from radical changes to our lives during this pandemic? Insight into the nature of reality reveals that change is the norm and not an exception. Some changes are gradual and harder to notice, while others are radical.
 
If you look carefully into nature, you’ll realize that everything changes. Just look at your own body. It is always changing: skin tone, hair loss, weight changes, aging, etc. If we don’t notice some of these subtle changes, we may become deluded into thinking and wishing that things remain the same — a false concept of normalcy.
 
The notion of things changing as not being normal is neither scientific nor realistic. It is downright incorrect. As we come to understand that reality is in constant flux, we lose our aversion to change — a major cause of stress. Also, we when learn not to cling to how things were, another stress factor is gone.
 
Biology and neuroscience provide good answers to the delusion that things should remain the same. All organisms, including human beings strive for reliability, dependability, sustainability, predictability and normalcy for survival purposes. The more difficult it is for an organism to predict and rely on its knowledge about its environment, the harder it is for that organism to survive. Humans, a species that has adapted to so many different types of environments around the world for centuries, are designed for survival and not for happiness. However, we have the capacity, through our neocortex, to regulate emotions for happiness.

Many new students come to my Mindfulness Meditation class with the goal or desire to stop the troubling “mind chatter” going on in their head. The human default mode network (DMN as it is known in neuroscience) is that of mind-wandering or ”monkey mind.” I always explain to them that there is nothing wrong with monkey mind. In fact, it is a sign of a normal and healthy brain function. During mind chatter, the flow of blood provides nutrients to nourish the brain. A disruption to the mind chatter can be a symptom of brain abnormalities such Alzheimer’s or a coma.

I further explain to my students that it is not the “chattering” that causes their troublesome experience rather it is the “content and quality” of thoughts that are produced during such chattering. If the thought content and quality are negative, (for example: I don’t like myself, I failed, I am not desirable, etc.) then the affect is adverse. If, however, the thought content and quality are positive, (for example: I feel great after that exercise, I enjoyed that meal, I like where I am, etc.) then their affect is wholesome.

If you study the content and quality of your thoughts produced during mind chatter, you will find that they are always in the languages and experiences that of your past: there is no way that they would contain anything to which you have never been exposed. For example, you will never think of pepes unless you know that it is a delicious dish from Java where the fish/chicken/tofu is smeared with curry and other exotic herbs, wrapped in banana leaf and barbecued. Your thoughts do not chatter in Sundanese or Arabic, unless you know those languages.

This election cycle has heightened the rhetoric of those speaking out against different ethnic groups and women. In the 10 days after Donald Trump became the official president-elect, 867 hate incidents were documented nationwide by the South Poverty Law Center in Montgomery, Alabama. The affects of racial hate are in front and center our own Portland metro backyard. In West Linn High School, students walked out in mid-November to protest students who called a fellow Muslim student a terrorist and a Latino student "illegal." At Lake Oswego High School, a racist comment was posted for several weeks on the student-run Facebook page and an anti-Semitic photo was posted in the school cafeteria.
 
Over the past few months, Dr. Larry Sherman, Professor of Neuroscience at the Oregon Health & Science University, gave several public talks on You and Your Racist Brain: The Neuroscience of Prejudice. He was also invited to speak to at Lake Oswego High School in early December in response to the post-election hate incidents on campus. In Dr. Sherman’s view, racism exists when one group dominates, excludes or seeks to eliminate another group on the basis of differences that it believes are inherent, hereditary and unalterable. He further explains that racism, in large part, involves learned behaviors that stem from the human brain’s tendency to engage in prejudice, a process where our brains make judgments that are not based on experience or reason.
 
I agree with Dr. Sherman’s definition of racism and his linkage between the brain, conditioning and prejudice. Moreover, when we look at racism from the perspective of Mindfulness as a form of unwholesome judging, we can gain more insight about its direct affect upon us.
 
From a Mindfulness perspective, racism falls into the category of judging, which includes comparing. Judging is a normal part of our human makeup that is shared by all beings as a way to navigate life. Our ability to judge helps us to discern, for example, the differences between:

• survival versus demise,
• hunger versus being satiated,
• right versus wrong,
• big versus small,
• us versus them,
• superior versus inferior,
• rich versus poor,
• acceptable versus deplorable.

 
This ability to discern through judging and comparing can be beneficial in Mindfulness practice to distinguish between the concepts of wholesome versus unwholesome and happiness versus suffering. So it is not the act of judging or comparing that may cause us to suffer, but its applications and how we relate to them.
 
With wisdom as our guide, we can discern what kind of judging can cause stress and what kind of comparing can help us to eliminate suffering. Judgments or comparisons that cause friction, a breakdown in harmony, compromise peacefulness, threaten happiness, promote greed, hate and delusion (the latter three, known as the Three Roots of Suffering, according to the Buddha) are clearly unwholesome.
 
As we tune into our awareness of body, mind and feelings through Mindfulness Meditation, we can really sense how unwholesome conduct feels very different compared to wholesome conduct. When we turn our awareness mindfully to racism, we may experience the sensations of tightness, heaviness, constriction, uneasiness. Our heart may feel queasy and racy. We may feel an impulse to strike or run away. Our mind may become muddled or obsessed. We may feel unsafe. We may feel ill will, hate or fear arising. We may also experience that our sleep quality — and our health — are adversely affected. Indeed, Dr. Sherman views racism as “a public health problem” due to the high cortisol effects of stress on our bodies — both for victims and perpetrators.
 
The opposite of racism is tolerance. The experience of tolerance through Mindfulness practice may give us a bodily-felt sense of ease, release, warmth, lightness, groundedness, composure, contentment, and confidence. When we practice tolerance, we more likely experience a stronger impulse towards kindness, generosity, compassion, tranquility, happiness, and better health.
 
In our practice, we can overcome unwholesome judging by bringing awareness to our minds and noticing what arises. Our detached inner dialogue may include phrases such as:

• “Ooh … this is intolerance.”
• “This is unwholesome judging.”
• “The mind feels this way.”
• “The emotion feels like this.”
• “The body is stressed out.”

This internal feedback loop is our direct, authentic, experiential response to what is unwholesome.
 
Our practice of Mindfulness is enough to allow what is unwholesome to lose its grip and power over us. Take some time to contemplate which option is more beneficial for your well-being — tolerance or intolerance. As we deepen our awareness of cognition and bodily-felt experiences through meditation, we gain an insight that nurtures our wisdom in pursuit of a life free from suffering. We may reclaim, once again, our inner peace, and stay on the path to cultivate our happiness.

A student recently suggested that I view psychiatrist Robert Waldinger’s 13-minute TED Talk on the longitudinal Harvard study of adult development that has tracked 700 men over a period of 75 years. Dr. Waldinger, the study’s fourth director, summarized the findings as follows:

1. Good relationships keep us happier and healthier.
2. Social relationships are good for us, and loneliness kills.
3. Good relationships don’t just protect our bodies; they protect our brains.

 
While the presentation is well-done, I have a few bones to pick about setting up the notion of happiness to rely chiefly on our outside relationships.
 
So often it is said that “relationships are the key to happiness,” and we begin to reflect upon our relations to others (friends, family, community, etc.). However, as we look deeper into the true nature of relationships, the connection between relationships and happiness is not that simple and may even be misleading. It is disingenuous to say that our suffering is caused by lack of availability or not having a relationship. A person may express self-pity and say that s/he is an only child and that both parents are dead. On the other hand, a person may have many siblings and living parents but chooses to be in touch with them rarely. Toxic relationships, such with as abusive parents or a spouse, may actually cause suffering instead of happiness. A person’s misconstrued sense of being unwanted by others, may even lead to violent acts such as in the case of the infamous Columbine High School massacre.
 
Mindfulness practice emphasizes a person's internal capacity for and cultivation of well-being. When a person succeeds in improving his/her relationship with himself/herself, such as removal of destructive emotions or attitudes, then his or her relationship with others will naturally improve with ease.
 
Suppose you know a person who has a tendency to be impatient, an example of a destructive emotion. Notice how this quality plays out to affect that person's well-being as well as its impact on others. Impatience breeds a lack of tolerance, an agitated mind, and an energy that is not peaceful in nature. The impatient person is usually high-strung, easily agitated, and hot-headed. Inside the person’s body, the heart pounds and there is tension whenever temper flares up. People around this person often feel unsafe, disrespected, not heard, and offended. As a response to the disturbance they feel, others guard against attack and prepare for possible retaliation by the impatient one. Thus a tendency toward impatience causes unproductive and even harmful relationships all around and inside.
 
But positive change is possible. We have the potential to rewire ourselves for better, happier relationships. The impatient person may eradicate impatience by realizing its unproductive nature. A person’s commitment to understanding the benefits of being patient, then consciously cultivating the practice of being patient, can shift the entire nexus of relationships (with self and others) to be peaceful and more productive.
 
In addition, through Mindfulness practice, we can develop inner strength and peace to the point of self-sufficiency with regard to our ability to cultivate inner happiness. We learn to rely less on what or how other people treat us and enjoy going inside to find solace.
 
No doubt, peaceful, supportive, loving relationships bring us joy. However, our true happiness relies more on our cultivation of inner skills than outer relationships.

Mindfulness literature portrays the practice of generosity as the first prerequisite to the rest of the Ten Perfections. This precedence emphasizes the importance of generosity. Without generosity, the mind is tight, selfish, bound and shackled by a strong ego. Under such weight, it is not possible to find relief or explore what is possible. 

With your own awareness of body, feelings, and mind, you can notice how generosity feels. It is light and not heavy. It engenders feelings of being at ease, warmheartedness, open and peaceful. It has a sensation of positive energy.

Now consider its opposite — stinginess. Feel the tightness, constriction, tension, fear and lack of ease in your body. In your mind’s eye, experience the burden of your thoughts as consider the concept of stinginess.

Biochemistry shows that how we feel directly affects chemical reactions in our body through hormonal secretions and electrical spikes commensurate to our state of mind. So, if we truly listen to ourselves we know deep down that generosity promotes good health and happiness.

Check out the recent article by Terri Yablonsky Stat on the benefits of giving for your own health and happiness.

Now that our Top of Mind blog is up and running again, our vision is to create a safe place for community sharing on topics relevant to our practice of Mindfulness Meditation. Our time together in class is simply not long enough to learn about all the changes that meditation students are experiencing. So each month we'll start with a reflective question and encourage your responses. Why is this type of  community engagement important?


1.    Articulating your reflections helps balance your mind with positive reinforcement of your growing insights.
2.    As people express their learnings, we realize that we are not alone in our experience of mindfulness. We begin to appreciate the range of life’s possibilities through sharing.
3.    Supporting each others’ practice through sharing our insights creates a synergistic, dynamic, learning community for the benefit of all. 

So find your courage and your voice. Feel free to type in your "top of mind" responses in the comments section below this post so that we may engender a lively dialogue of different perspectives.

Here's the reflective question for the month of September:

How has the practice of meditation changed your perspective on life?

We live in a consumer-based culture that values success based on the attainment of the comfortable life. We surround ourselves with exotic pillows, fine beds, soft chairs, fashionable clothing, pain medications, an abundance of food, state-of-the-art devices and entertainment galore. There is nothing wrong with possessions and comfort. Nevertheless, attachment to these comforts can be a source of stress.

Let us examine comfort with respect to some of the underlying elements that can cause stress.

We live in a consumer-based culture that values success based on the attainment of the comfortable life. We surround ourselves with exotic pillows, fine beds, soft chairs, fashionable clothing, pain medications, an abundance of food, state-of-the-art devices and entertainment galore. There is nothing wrong with possessions and comfort. Nevertheless, attachment to these comforts can be a source of stress.

Let us examine comfort with respect to some of the underlying elements that can cause stress.

• Delusion: We may think it is our given right to be comfortable, not realizing that discomfort is also part of reality. It is not realistic to live always in comfort and become intolerant to discomfort. Birth, aging, illness and death are aspects of life that are not comfortable in nature.
• Hate: Aversion to discomfort also is a cause of stress. When we experience discomfort, we may become angry. Anger is a major stressor.
• Greed: We may find that our endless pursuit of the comfortable life may result in tremendous financial and mental burdens. Difficult to satisfy the desire for comfort, we continue to seek more and more comforts. The result is more agitation and stress.

How can mindfulness meditation help us deal with the stress of a comfortable life? Meditation practice can help us regain an understanding of what truly is reality as well as gaining tolerance to discomfort, developing patience, and finding ways to change our attitude towards discomfort to eliminate stress. It is possible to feel discomfort yet be free from feeling stressed.

Obviously, at the primal level discomfort can be a biofeedback mechanism to indicate that something is wrong. Therefore, it is appropriate to seek a doctor’s advice to cure an illness that brings discomfort. However, it is possible to deal with the discomfort without causing stress.

It is easier to build acceptance and tolerance to discomfort when its intensity is light. During meditation practice, for example, sitting for a long period may become uncomfortable. This sitting can become a safe opportunity to analyze the mind’s relationship to sensation that is not comfortable. As we meditate, we can track the discomfort and the way it may disappear.

How can we build our tolerance to discomfort? By challenging ourselves to get out of our comfort zones in prudent ways. For example, once a week try sleeping on the floor instead of a bed or fasting for day. These practices will give you the opportunity to not react to an uncomfortable feeling right away. Instead, you can focus on analyzing the mind’s relationship to discomfort and see if a new perspective can be developed in a way that does not cause you stress. You can begin to feel grateful when experiencing a discomfort by knowing that the nerve system is functioning. Discomfort need not be not stressful.

How can mindfulness meditation help us deal with the stress of a comfortable life? Meditation practice can help us regain an understanding of what truly is reality as well as gaining tolerance to discomfort, developing patience, and finding ways to change our attitude towards discomfort to eliminate stress. It is possible to feel discomfort yet be free from feeling stressed.

Obviously, at the primal level discomfort can be a biofeedback mechanism to indicate that something is wrong. Therefore, it is appropriate to seek a doctor’s advice to cure an illness that brings discomfort. However, it is possible to deal with the discomfort without causing stress.

It is easier to build acceptance and tolerance to discomfort when its intensity is light. During meditation practice, for example, sitting for a long period may become uncomfortable. This sitting can become a safe opportunity to analyze the mind’s relationship to sensation that is not comfortable. As we meditate, we can track the discomfort and the way it may disappear.

How can we build our tolerance to discomfort? By challenging ourselves to get out of our comfort zones in prudent ways. For example, once a week try sleeping on the floor instead of a bed or fasting for day. These practices will give you the opportunity to not react to an uncomfortable feeling right away. Instead, you can focus on analyzing the mind’s relationship to discomfort and see if a new perspective can be developed in a way that does not cause you stress. You can begin to feel grateful when experiencing a discomfort by knowing that the nerve system is functioning. Discomfort need not be not stressful.

Going Inside
In mindfulness meditation, we use the breath as a way to get into the “inside.” While focusing our attention within, we can remain grounded in the present moment, uniting the mind with the body. As we stay mindfully alert, we can ardently direct attention on the breath as the object of meditation, stilling both mind and body.

In meditation, a subtle but critical learning opportunity exists in understanding “what is” in an objective manner and in reading our biofeedback sensors. Ardently redirecting the mind to the object of meditation helps us learn how to direct the mind to a desired focus. At the same time, the practice of focusing offers a deeper comprehension of the nature of the mind.

We can apply the skills and insight developed in meditation towards removal of stress. Our objectives are to understand two crucial questions:

  1. How do we play a part in causing stress?
  2. How can we replace unproductive behavior with better patterns that can maintain our sense of well-being?

Practice and Skill Building
Instead of focusing on outside factors as the cause of stress, by going “inside” we will learn how to react to outside factors in a way that does not cause stress. This method can only be applied if we gain confidence for directing the mind toward thinking productively. Meditation practice offers a safe, private, and realistic way to hone the skills required to direct the mind in a more productive manner. Sensitive to our biofeedback mechanism, honed in meditation, our body and mind will alert us whenever we need to use the skills we have practiced to overcome a stressful encounter.

Getting ourselves deeply familiar with our mind and body is the first necessary step to understand stress factors and how to overcome them skillfully. The practice of getting to know deeply and transcendentally requires a state of calmness for seeing what cannot be noticed otherwise.

Acquiring the skills needed to understand stress, the cause of stress, and the way to end stress requires effort. Just like learning any new skills, once a person is able to master the skills, then the process becomes effortless. Three P’s are requisite to skill building. These include the frequency of Practice, Persistence, and Patience. Practicing together with other people offers support and synergy towards mastery of skills.

Living with Less Stress
Why learn from the inside out? Because the outside is not as dependable, and it is difficult to control. The only thing you can control is how you relate to the outside environment. Besides, who will take care of ourselves better and have our best interests at heart than ourselves? Moreover, is often the case that our own perceptions and interpretations of reality cause stress.

Mindfulness meditation practice helps us look deeply in to the “inside,” develop well honed concentration skills, and utilize our biofeedback tools to put us on alert whenever a certain unproductive reaction is about to occur. Then, by discerning what reaction (or non-reaction) would be wiser to pursue, we can redirect our mind away from our usual automatic and conditioned response toward a more productive and non-stressful response.

Practice Suggestions
The following exercises are designed to help you build skills in overcoming stress from the inside out.

1. Reduce stimulation from the outside (e.g., lower or turn off TVs, radios, electronic instruments, etc.) and find more time to be alone in silence. Notice your “inside.”
2.  Apply objective/detached observation with regard to how you internally relate to an object or phenomenon, arising first.
3. Contemplate changing your inner attitude or perspective toward an object or a phenomenon from negative to positive. Then consciously apply a change in attitude toward a situation that you have experienced.
4. Focus on how you habitually relate to an outside object or situation as well as a phenomenon arising from inside of you. Contemplate useful or beneficial changes (with details) leading to wiser ways of responding that produce happiness.